Day 144, gross, waste, hazard, celery

Commander Milstrothenar Eric surveyed the area.

There was no sign of the internal despair felt by the Commander while considering the mess made by the construction company Wailstrangler Timpani.

Boulders littered the pavement.

Have they no consideration for their fellow beings thought the Commander.

Previously the Commander had tried the website of the Health & Safety Executive but the pages for reporting such matters returned a trail of 404 and sql database errors.  Useless.


Now the situation appeared to be getting worse.

The Commander was sorely vexed.  This was no small thing.  The Commander, while still in the prime of spawning age, was known to have popped out the eyeballs of opponents by a deft flick of the wrist to the back of their heads.  Then while sucking out the juice of the squidgy orbs the offender would have the error of their ways explained to them.

Those days of minor aggravation and violence were behind the Commander now, at least since the anger management course at Far Distance Headquarters.  It was a stipulation of leading the Earth mission that a reasonable and managed level of psychopathy was maintained.  A few deep breaths and all was under control.

The Commander enlisted the assistance of the 32cm long foot of a passing human to record the incidents and give an indication of the size of the debris.

The human foot was returned to its operator who then hobbled off down the road emitting muffled cries.  The Commander had explained that they would be able to remove the mouthful of compacted celery if they used a corkscrew, but only once the pain had subsided. Humans and their low pain thresholds, huh.  Celery is noted for its curative nature during amputation and re-attachment, there could be little complaint from the human as the healing process would be suitably accelerated.

Ho hum.  Back to the mission.