The modern world provides many of us with wonderful and innovative technology. Whatever technology we have available we try to use in as many novel and diverse ways as possible.
Having a few electronic components kicking around, some free time, and some very sharp and narrow scalpel blades led me to experiment.
The result of the implants wasn't quite as expected. My desire was that there would be super-strength, the ability to lift large objects, and world peace. Unfortunately none of this was evident in the results of the experiment.
The rose bush had to be removed using the traditional method of brute force using a spade, a mattock, and a fork - this demonstrated that the super-strength element was missing. The rocks were also no easier to move, disproving the ability to lift large objects. The world peace part thus far has been inconclusive, my empirical evidence is that nobody has done anything in the street that disproves it. But there are many areas out of sight, and in fact many other streets, not only here but around the world, which haven't been revealed.
Ok, I've just seen the news, so there is no world peace either.
My theories don't appear to have stood up to a great deal of testing. A result is a result and should be taken as such, my theory was disproved. Clearly just stuffing a load of diodes, transistors, capacitors and resistors into a newly dug set of cavities in my arm hadn't cut it.
While I was attempting to remove the rose bush Cato*, the new neighbour cat, mentioned something about neutrino mass. However neutrino mass is so small that this can't have caused any issues for me when attempting to release the rose bush and was unlikely to have neutralised any potential effect of the implants. *Cato has a keen interest in physics, specifically radioactive decay, possibly due to him sleeping in a sealed box.
No arms were actually harmed in the construction and collation of this story.
This blog is a placeholder for a better blog that I couldn't be arsed writing which would have been about the political state of the nation, the machinations of dubious landlords exploiting us (the public, the funders, benefactors and owners of the state) by rapaciously buying up former council properties, and the inventive use of language and sleight of hand in passing the responsibilities of the owner of the means of production onto the worker by the suggestion that your life will be improved by doing a selection of tasks (you know the sort, things that sound like they might be useful, time-management, multi-tasking, Vogon empathy, fast-response keyboard skills, Canadian air-force exercises, tai-chi, topological complexity disentanglement) by tapping into the vocabulary of self-help and 'healing' literature to make it appealing to the worker rather than actually addressing root causes.
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